Perspective; a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view.
Strangely enough today is a great example of how my perspective of the day can be affected by one thing that drives me crazy, I mean absolutely bonkers, and one thing that makes me happy.
If you are a frequent reader of ‘sayanything’ you have a bit of an idea of what drives me crazy. One thing that makes my job, and relationship with Atticus, somewhat difficult is his temper. I love the man to death. He is my father; I literally wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for him [and my mom]. I take a lot after him, as it happens. I get my love for the law [who knew], reserved personality, strategic thinking, studiousness, and brown hair from him. [I get my sense of humor, affinity for rock music, love of traveling, skill for card games, and most of my looks from my mother, Meryl.] I don’t know who I got my level-headedness from. Seriously, I love both of my parents, and at times I am stubborn and do have quite the temper, but for the majority of the time I am easy-going and hard to rattle. Atticus gets rattled at the smallest of things. He is a very A-type personality. Everything must be just so, or the world is falling down. I can relate to that in a small sense, but the majority of the time I have to hide the rolling of my eyes when he gets set off.
Maybe it’s older age, maybe it’s his control-freak personality. What it is, is a thorn in my side. The morning could be going perfectly; the office is filled with compatible laughter and the smell of roasted coffee, and then BAM….something is wrong. He’s cursing, stomping around, breathing fire out of his nose; acting very similar to a child if they don’t get their way. Usually it is because of some small detail, and I walk away under the guise of doing something else so I can roll my eyes, and sigh. I’m used to his behavior, but it irritates me at a fundamental level. Since I am his daughter, it is easy to be his punching bag. I’m not the usual, unrelated employee where you just can’t talk to them or make an exhibit of yourself the way he does with me. So, he takes advantage of that fact.
As I said, I’m used to that kind of behavior. I’m also used him backtracking and sometimes I get a rare apology, once he collects himself. I deal with it as best as I can. What do you do if a child is retaliating or throwing a temper tantrum? Do you retaliate and start yelling and smarting back? No, you pretend as if it isn’t happening [unless you discipline your child-which I support and applaud] and let them work it out themselves. I use that way of thinking with him, even though he is not a child. It works. Plus, I don’t want the drama of fighting. I’m easy to verbally injure, and would probably spend the day sniffling tears. That is not an ideal day for me.
His temper-tantrums are not few and far between, so I am not surprised today when he flares up. I roll my eyes and walk away. He tries to engage me, but I deny him the satisfaction, and continue on with my work. That is one half of my morning.
Chex Mix; one of my favorite foods ever. I’m snacking on this as I decide what the best part of my morning has been. It’s not just one thing though. Snacking on Chex Mix makes me happy. My Classic Rock Pandora station makes me happy. The brisk sunny day shining in through the blinds of my office makes me happy. My sister Kate had an important and good night last night; that makes me ecstatic. I saw my present from Matt this morning, which finally arrived last night. It’s a painting of Thomas Kinkade’s; one of his Disney collections. When Matt and I went to Savannah, GA for our trip this year we were at Thomas Kinkade’s gallery and I fell in love with his Disney Collection paintings. They were too expensive so I couldn’t get any, but Matt completely surprised me last night with the painting of ‘The Little Mermaid’. You should have heard my squeals and gasps of delight. That definitely made me happy. My Mocha Swirl coffee delights me as much as it does my taste buds. Waking up to Matt and kissing him makes me happy. My littlest sister, Abigail, turns 15 tomorrow. This makes me equally happy as it does astonished at how fast time flies.
So my internal dilemma is which feeling do I let control how the rest of my day will occur. The answer is obvious. Look at all that is good with my day. To let someone else’s temper affect the good I have going for me is absurd. It’s easy to let someone else’s actions mess with your mood; I’m guilty of this one as well. I might not have piles of green in my bank, and birds singing “Zip-a-dee-doo-dah” as they perch on my shoulder, but I do have a lot in my favor. Before I wrote this I might have focused more on being yelled at by Atticus, than by the blessings I have this morning, and the rest of the day would have fallen in accordingly. Not today. It’s a good way to go about it, I think. Let the majority of good shine over the small bit of bad.
I hope the rest of you fine people choose the same perspective this morning. Find your ‘happy’ and just sink right in.